Before reading any further, just take a short moment to reflect on all the moments last week you spent waiting. You know, waiting in line at the supermarket, at the bus stop, for your friend who texted 45 minutes ago already that he was “almost there”, and watching your life burn away while sitting out the obligatory YouTube ads. Add them up, multiply by 52, and think of all the things you could’ve done instead.
Don’t feel bad about yourselves though, because in the land of Waiting, there is only one true king, who coincidentally is also England’s future monarch: Prince Charles. Heir apparent since 1952, the Prince of Wales has been waiting on the sidelines for 63 years and counting. Earlier this week, his granddaughter Princess Charlo e of Wales was born, and she claimed the number four slot in the line of succession, bumping uncle Harry to the fifth place.
Because she is the second-born child of William though, the chance that she will ever actually sit on the throne is quite small. Armed with this knowledge, and endless financial backing from the royal vault, she could decide to live a second-born life like Prince Harry did, and throw her future birthday parties at venues of her liking, presumably starting at McDonald’s.
Just like every other kid, the young Royal Highness will probably fancy a Happy Meal more than caviar at a young age, but it seems that she will have to watch her burgers closely. On Wednesday, McDonald’s re-introduced a character who had once been part of their marketing line-up as a comical villain next to Ronald McDonald, but then was unceremoniously dumped in 2003 when the company ditched their playful image for a more serious one, and has now been brought back to life: the Hamburglar. However, instead of the funnily drawn masked man who children liked and hoped to get a figurine of in their happy meal, the company has given him a 21st century touch which didn’t go down well at all with their customers and shareholders. Although we laud the company’s efforts to bring back an old favourite, we do have to admit that he kind of looks like a creep.
The reappearance of the Hamburglar, who as his name already implies, has made a living out of the lost art of stealing one’s Big Mac, couldn’t come at a more inconvenient time for McDonald’s, because a er the fast food firm’s struggle with the trend of living healthy, the dadbod (or Dad Body) has been announced as the new flavour of the week. Fraternities worldwide and, frankly, all men who aren’t Ryan Gosling or Chris Hemsworth, rejoiced as the news broke. Eating as much as you like without feeling the need to work out in order to look good, it sounds almost too good to be true. Among the trendse ers are Leonardo DiCaprio and Mad Men’s Jon Hamm, apparently. Let’s hope for McDonald’s sake that their new Hamburglar will head back into retirement quickly. Oh, and if you’re interested to find out whether having a beer belly will actually work as a student in Maastricht, stay tuned to our channel, because Adriaan and Piotr have grown their Mythbuster-moustache, and will dissect the Maastricht Syndrome for you.
Speaking of Ryan Gosling: he finally ate his cereal a er the creator of the immensely popular Vine movies in which the actor refused to do so, passed away on Monday.
That’s all for this week, but keep an eye on your Facebook feed, because the new episode will be out tomorrow!